The biggest mistake of my career

When was the last time you had a memory, and it was so vivid that it almost felt like you’d gone back in time? Or maybe you had a flashback of something that happened in the past that really took you back.

If the memory triggers an emotional response, the body may even react as if it feels like you’re reliving the moment.

In my very early career as a graduate market analyst in a consulting company, I was lucky enough to be given the chance to work on a major account with the world’s biggest shaving company. (Lucky for me - it turns out not so lucky for them!).

A few months into the gig I’d sent them a report with some very exciting news about a major promotion they’d run, which had gone extremely well. Good news travels fast, and within hours the CEO of the UK company had congratulated his entire team, and by the end of the day, the Global CEO in Boston had thanked his Executive team and informed them they’d likely be getting their Christmas bonus.

The next day I reworked the numbers and realised I’d made a mistake. I felt terrible. They’d not done nearly as well as I’d said. I had a sick feeling in my stomach that ended up lasting for days. I told my boss immediately, who had to tell the client, who then had to tell the UK boss, who then had to inform the Global CEO in Boston, who in turn had to get his Exec back together and let them know things weren’t as rosy as they’d been told.

It was a world-class stuff up and even as I write this now, I can feel the horrible knot in my stomach - over 25 years later. Clearly I haven’t gone back in time, but in some ways it literally feels like I’m back in that moment again.

For some people it could be waking up at 3am with the very real thought that you’re back in a problematic situation. Whether it’s at night, or we drift off into our minds during the day, when this sort of thing happens it can be helpful to become aware that it’s our thoughts distracting us with the drama. Our mind thinks that it’s more important than what’s happening right now, so it takes our focus there instead.

If you end up living in your head, and re-running memories of things that have happened in the past, you’ll likely miss important things that are going on around you.

It’s a helpful reminder that we only have the moment that’s happening right now. That’s all there is. Our thoughts can feel like we’re being taken back in time, but when they do that they distract us from what we’re doing right now. We get lost in thoughts, and just like my monumental stuff up, it can impact how we’re feeling right now, regardless of what our current reality is.

So we need to be aware when our mind takes us off into ‘the past’ that this is actually happening right now, and is likely distracting us from what we’re meant to be doing - so we’re not being present with the people we're with.

Being aware when we get lost in these unhelpful thoughts is vital to then finding a way to detach from them, and find a sense of stresslessness.

Try it today. See if you can notice when you get dragged into a memory, and distracted from what’s happening around you right now.